#1 Unity Completely connected to eachother no matter what the situation or circumstances might come into play. How do you create unity? With the realization that whatever is going on, being connect is ultimately your #1 priority. Lay down pride and create your precursers. I love you, I want the best for you and I want the best for our marriage. Never say or purpose to bring the other partner down but do everything in your power to lift the other half up, whether it is in a challenge a confrontation or an encouragement. The goal is to create unity, not to make yourself feel better at the expense of the other. Stay as far away from selfishness as possible. Selfishness kills relationships.
#2 Cherish Going beyond just loving someone. Showing your spouse that you truly embrace who they are as a person and what they bring to your life. How do you cherish your spouse? You take the time to think about them. Put yourself in their shoes. Even when you don't feel like it do something special. Laugh with your spouse. Cry with your spouse. Tell them often why you love them and what you like about them in detail. Touch everyday. Kiss everyday, even the days you don't feel like it. Find joy in all the little moments with eachother.
#3 Passion The way you show your husband or wife that you love them. How do you show passion? Passion is multi-faceted. Keep your physical relationship a priority. Love on eachother often. Be extravagant with your praise and with your challenge. The passion that you show with your spouse when you are happy with them should be the same passion you show when you see something that will effect your relationship negatively. If its a big deal let it be a BIG DEAL! Don't let things fester under the surface. Always deal with issues. (Of course while being in unity and cherishing eachother)
#4 Strength Being the support to your spouse when they are weak. Don't allow yourself to become selfishly motivated when your husband or wife is going through a rough patch. Embrace the saying when you are weak I am strong. Know that we all have times of sadness, depression and fatigue. Stay strong and support by staying in unity (humility), cherishing (supporting and loving) and showing passion (in encouragment and loving challenge). Also acknowlege when you are weak and thank your spouse for being there when you needed them.
#5 Relationships Staying connected to others. A good marriage is never accomplished alone. You are only as strong as those that you are connected too. Surround yourself with those who have the same values and beliefs as you. Have others in your life that you look up to and respect. Be purposeful in asking questions and being open about where you are at even if you are going through hard times. Have those who have a younger relationship in your life. You always have tips you can give ;) and it brings reminders of where you have come from and the memories that you have built together.
#6 Goals Make goals together. Whether its individual goals and desires or family goals. Do it together so you are able to support eachother to see the goals accomplished. Rejoice in every accomplishment. It's a big deal. Show in your actions how important your relationship is by staying aware of eachothers passions and desires.
Finally and most importantly,
#7 God Belief and trust in God. Knowing that he has all the revelation and support that you need to keep your relationship strong. As you live life together aimed at a higher purpose than yourself you are able to stay away from selfishness and create a beautiful love story. Refinement is always to come. I love embracing what I can to become a better wife to my husband. I am excited to learn more lessons and to gain a greater revelation on what it takes to keep our marriage strong. I encourage all you who are married to keep your marriage strong and a priority. And all you who are looking to get married. Learn lots, practise lots, continue to grow and never listen to the negative opinions on marriage. You can have passionate relationship to last a life time!!! For all you who have been married for longer. I would love to hear you thoughts and advice to add to my 8 years!!!