For today I though I would announce something special!!
I eluded to it on Tuesday... tehehehehe....
We are EXPECTING!!! Baby #6 to come Early November!!!
Lots of things come to mind when I think about this pregnancy.
To start this has been the first time that I have genuinely been surprised. With all the others I knew the time was coming. This was a bit of a new experience.
I have had to process more this time than I have with the others. We had said that we were pretty sure we were done at 5 babes. In my mind, it was a wisdom call. I felt I had a good handle on the 5 girls. My quiver was full. I felt like I could do a great job raising the 5 girls. On top of that we have been overwhelmingly blessed with 5 healthy children. What more could I ask for????!!!!! We were thankful for being able to have so many children and didn't take it for granted. Plus the birth of our last one was almost magical. I couldn't imagine a better experience to finish off our family!!! Yet we did not feel the peace to do anything permanent. I often said to friends that, if I didn't get so sick and had so many hip issues at the end I would jump at the opportunity to have a 6th. But I couldn't in full consciousness have another one and sacrifice the girls for 9 months.
Then the test!!
I praise the Lord for my husband who is so amazing. I know I might sound like a broken record by now. But I have honestly been blown away with him. The peace that covered him was exactly what I needed. He challenged my attitude. But not only that, has continued to rise to the occasion taking on more than I could ever expect out of a full time (plus) hard worker, father of 5 girls, fully invested in pouring into our local church and now to have a wife, that is in dear need of support.
I have a lot of fears in my weakness moments. Which is why Adam was challenging my attitude.
Can I possibly be able to handle having another baby? Can I be a blessing to my family, while being sick and dealing with joint pain? After experiencing the loss of a baby, I was also dealing with fears of the health of the baby.
But then I am reminded, I have God. I have a God that has a good and perfect plan. A God that desires to give us above and beyond what we expect out of life. We have been praying for favor and blessing. We have been praying for God to lead our family and direct our future.
After I walked down from our bathroom to register it all... I looked to our fridge. I have two things printed and put on my fridge that we are meditating on and believing for!! I couldn't help but giggle. God does have a sense of humor and praise the Lord he does have a hand in our lives.
Here I thought I have been set off track and yet that couldn't be further from the truth. God has been preparing us for months. He knew all along and was softening our hearts and building our capacity to handle another child and yet more change. Our prayer has always been give us the path that creates the best outcome regardless of the way too it. He is bringing abundance in our lives. Having a big family is a huge blessing but it isn't easy. Life is never simple. But then I remember... every person who has favor in the bible didn't have it easy. They had pressure points that help mold them into a better person, someone who sought after God in all things.
I desire that life. I desire a full life that has a full and beautiful future ahead. We talked with a couple family's after we found out we were expecting and the advice they gave was amazing. Don't plan for the today, plan for what you desire the future to look like. God will always help you with the today. AMEN to that!!!
As a step of faith, I have written a prayer, it's my prayer for this new little one. God's plan is so much greater than mine that I can hardly fathom it in my humanity.
"Lord we thank you for this opportunity to trust in you. We thank you for giving us this baby!! We sing praises to you as you knit together this little on in my womb. We have faith and hope and certainty for the things that we do not see. For by God all things were created including this baby! We thank you for the opportunity to build our family once more and we trust you to work out all the details as we cast all of our cares on you!! We fear not or dwell in the past but rest in the shadow of You our Almighty God. We choose peace as you are doing a new thing in us. As the streams spring up, we see you make a way. For Yours is the glory forever and ever. Amen."
For Freedom Friday I release all worries and cares about the pregnancy and birth of this incredible blessing of another baby!!!